Tom: F
Dm Bb
I break the silence with my voice
D
And everyone turns 'round
Bb
To see the source of all the noise
Dm
And here I stand
Bb
It's not as though I mean to upset you
Dm
With the things I say and do
Bb
I should know better, but I said so anyway
Dm Bb
It's easier to play a part
Dm
And read your lines
Bb
Than freely speak what's in your heart
Bb
And in your mind
Dm
Is it me
Bb
Who says these things that so offend you
Dm
Inappropriate and loud
I'd say I'm sorry, but it's
Bb F
Hard to speak with both feet in my mouth
[Chorus]
F Bb
All hail the king of dunces
F
You best hold on
C F
I'm opening up my mouth
Bb
Bring out the maypole
F G F
And tie me up and shut me out
Bb
Devil knows what possessed me
F C F
To shoot my arrow straight into the sky
Bb
String me to the mast and
F G Bb
Hoist me up and hang me high
F C
I put no blame on you
Bb F C Bb
I brought this all upon myself
Dm
It's just this thing I do
Bb
At times like this
Dm Bb Gm Dm Bb
I wish I was someone else
[Verse 2]
Dm Bb
There's a lever inside my head
Dm Bb Dm
Between my mouth and my brain
Bb
Keeps me from hearing what I've said
'Til it's too late
Dm
Now it's too late
F Dm Bb
Smear my lips with Vaseline
Dm
'cause I'm a vocal libertine
I try explaining but then
Bb F
Even I'm not quite sure what I mean
[Chorus]
Bb
All hail the king of dunces
F
You best hold on
C F
I'm opening up my mouth
Bb
Bring out the maypole
F Gm F
And tie me up and shut me out
Bb
Devil knows what possessed me
F C F
To shoot my arrow straight into the sky
Bb
String me to the mast and
F Gm F Bb
Hoist me up and hang me high
Am
I put no blame on you
Bb Dm Gm
I brought this all upon myself
Bb F Dm
It's just this thing I do
Bb
At times like this
F Bb F C F Bb F Gm F
I wish I was someone else
[Bridge]
Dm
I don't know what to say
Bb Dm
I was only trying to make you smile
Bb Dm Bb
And bring some needed levity
D Bb
To your world for a while
F Dm Bb
I never meant to make you cry
Dm Bb
But I did it all by myself
D Dm
It's just this thing I do
Bb
At times like this
D
I wish I was someone else!
[Chorus]
F Bb
All hail the king of dunces
F
You best hold on
C F
I'm opening up my mouth
Bb
Bring out the maypole
F Gm F
And tie me up and shut me out
Bb
Devil knows what possessed me
F C F
To shoot my arrow straight into the sky
Bb
String me to the mast and
F Gm F
Hoist me up and hang me high
[Outro]
Bb
All hail the king of fools
F
This boy's been bad
C F
Let's keep him after school
Bb
Send me to the blackboard
F Gm F
And write a hundred times "I am the dunce"
Bb
Devil knows what possessed me
F C F
To shut my mind and open up my mouth
Bb
String me to the anchor
F G Bb
And watch me drown in myself
